An army of Abramoffs will descend like locusts

Remember that little kid sitting next to Michelle Obama the other night? The plucky kid who wrote to Congress to ask for stimulus help to rebuild her collapsing school? The one who wrote, "We're not 'quitters?'"

Well, according to the Moonie Times, she's not plucky at all. In fact, she's an irresponsible, ungrateful guttersnipe.

Facts be damned. To the Times, the plight of J.V. Martin is actually a story of how locals can solve their own problem, but Ty'Sheoma and Obama have hijacked it to make it an example of how only the federal government can help. Obama said Ty'Sheoma's letter reflected "a willingness to take responsibility for our future and for posterity." The Times disagrees: "What is on display is not responsibility but irresponsibility. This is the new reality in America, that those with political pull will benefit, those without will not ... Connections are replacing competence as a measure of a person's worth."

Got it? Ty'Sheoma Bethea, she's no enterprising teen from a broken-down school. She sounds like the new Jack Abramoff, using her "political pull" and "connections" to benefit herself.

The brain bleeds.