Words of wisdom

It's funny, unlike most graduating seniors this year, Liberty U grads probably are certain of a job due to various rightwing welfare schemes, but even still, I don't think this is helpful advice.

Learn, laugh, love. Sleep hard, but sleep less. Pray on your knees.

To whom much is given much is required. You have been given the world and beyond. ... Never want anything too much. You will pay too high of a price one way or another. Labels are meaningless, but Louis Vuitton shoes are really the best. Someone you meet today is afraid or suffering. Find them. Find them every day and comfort them. Shoot to kill. Always tithe.

Wouldn't it be easier to shoot to kill before you comfort them rather than after? Just sayin'.