Millennial zombies?

I know there's a few of these so-called "millennials" amongst you, Dear Readers. Please tell me that this does not describe you.

Jeff "Criswell" Jarvis finds something else to love about our hopeless future: a brave new generation called "millennials" who, according to the Jersey Star Ledger,

can text message, listen to their iPods and instant message on their laptops -- all at the same time. They are patriotic and relentlessly optimistic about the future.

They rarely read books for fun and most likely aren't reading this newspaper.

They are the most diverse -- and perhaps the smartest -- generation in U.S. history...

The smartest generation in U.S. History? Do you know any people who take no pleasure in reading, need to be constantly entertained by demotic IMs and crappy pop music, and never believe anything but the best about themselves and the place they happened to have been born in?

I have. They're called morons. In fact I would say that such behaviors and beliefs are pretty much the definition of moronism.

To be fair to the kids, I do not for a second believe that they are as this article describes them -- else they would all be in special-needs facilities, instead of out there tearing up my lawn.

And in fairness to Jarvis, I've lately had to do a lot of research on these strange animals, otherwise known as "kids," and what I've read does point to them being a fairly clueless, selfish and self-absorbed lot. But, when I go out to "the field" for some primary source research, I don't find that to be the case, generally.