Is there a minor league team in Salem, Mass?

Murray Chass continues to be one of the few sports columnists who points out the bloviating and the self-aggrandizement of politicians bearing the flaming torches of indignation as they tirelessly hunt down the mysterious steroid abusers.

They especially like to criticize baseball for its policy on performance-enhancing substances. Initially, they said baseball's testing program was ineffective because it had not caught any big-name players. Then the program snares Palmeiro, one of only four players in history with 500 home runs and 3,000 hits, and they say, "See, baseball has a problem and it's not doing enough to get rid of it."

Appearing on an ESPN program last week, Representative Patrick McHenry, Republican of North Carolina, said he thought chances were getting better that Congress would pass steroids-testing legislation that would apply to all sports "because of baseball's inability to police their own players."

McHenry did not spell out what he meant by baseball's inability to police its players. Efforts to find out were unsuccessful. His press secretary said McHenry would call me, but he has not.

Was he referring to Palmeiro, and that because he tested positive baseball wasn't properly policing its players? Was he referring to the number of major leaguers who have tested positive, a grand total of 8 out of about 1,000 players tested this season? That's fewer than 1 percent.

Chass is one of the smartest baseball observers around, but he seems unaware that Congress needs this issue. The Bush administration has led us to an unnecessary war through dissembling and downright lies. They have approved the use of torture by our military and intelligence agencies. A Republican Congress is fat on pork and self-aggrandizement. They intend to eliminate estate taxes on the inheritance of people like Paris Hilton. They are in thrall to their corporate bankrolls and to Tom DeLay. The Republican governor of Ohio has been indicted and calls to amend the Constitution to make way for an Arnie presidential bid have...well...abated.

Need I go on?

Since they can't control themselves, can't provide oversight on an administration that is out of control with arrogance and incompetence, they will force their will on those teddible baseball players who are robbing our children...our children, Mandrake...of their heroes. Nay, their very hopes and dreams. Baseball players aren't addicted to steroids, Tom Davis and Patrick McHenry are.

Next thing you know, they'll be conducting their own form of testing.

Ah, but let their shrill, hypocritical ravings thunder on. It's obviously having a powerful effect on major league baseball. The fans are staying away in droves. As the scribe was once reported to have said, "Nobody goes there anymore, it's too crowded."