Do not, repeat, do not play poker with Dick Cheney

Via Wonkette, the editors of The Poor Man play poker with Dick Cheney.

They wished they hadn't.

Brit Hume: It seems like some people are still playing poker like it's September 10th. Back then, you needed to have all your cards in order to claim a straight. But, as we learned on that day, sometimes you won't have perfect knowledge. Sometimes you have to learn to connect the dots, and see the patterns which are not visible to superficial analysis of the type favored by the CIA and the State Department. Dick Cheney's skip straight is a winning poker hand for the post-9/11 world.

Rush Limbaugh: Do The Editors have two pairs, or a pair of twos? First they say one thing, then another. What are they hiding?

Andrew Sullivan: Dick Cheney never said he had a straight. He was very careful about this. His cards can form many different hands. None of these hands alone can beat a pair of twos; but, taken together, the combination of all possible hands presents a more compelling case for taking the pot than simply screaming "Pair of twos! Pair of twos!" as unprincipled liberal critics of the Vice President so often do.

After the cards were confiscated, Bush, in an interview, declared that, "Heh, heh, Dick may have misspoke a bit about the straight-thing. But everyone, even Clinton, thought he had a straight. And I'm a staight president. Look into my heart."

Later, Cheney, despite the President's renunciation of the claim, reiterated that he had a straight and added, "Go fbleep yourself."

But my favorite bit, from what has to be one of the funniest postings I've ever read, is this comment, apparently sincere:

Too much hatred emanating from liberals. None of them want to merely find a solution to the worlds' problems. They spend all their time and energy on hatred and futile attempts at being witty. -- Voop

I'm glad we "straightened" that out.